What inspires one to tell

The closest that they ever been to hell

A little feeling flourished me not too long agoNever felt it before it was wonderful

I pursued it and my life was a high

I couldn′t come down, the stars aligned

I'd give my heart, and I′d give my life

Until she stabbed me with the blade of a sharp knife

And it ain't her fault, but at the same time it was

I had panic attacks, and I knew the cause

I pitch my voice down, hate the sound of my track

Can't hear myself echo through the playback

I was fucked up like never before, I resent it

I decided to kill myself when school ended

The 16th of December when the time was right

Same time as that motherfucking movie night

So it was to my surprise

That′d I′d wake up

The next day and rise

The next day and rise

(Don't know how to get you out of my mind)

Did showing me her picture make you feel any better?

(Where the fuck do I reside?)

You′re not human, you don't care

(Please tell me to go and hide)

I′ve never hurt myself, I've never cut or tied anything

Around my neck like my friend almost did

I wish I knew but now he′s doing better than as a kid

I can't bring myself to add the scars that I lack

My whole family was scared at the stretch marks on my back

I was contemplating, going insane wondering

If I ever travel through your mind?

An angry voice yelling "wish I had more time"?

That same friend asked me a question last July

It was "do you have a hunch about how you'll die"

About how you′ll die

I′ve always wanted to make a song about her

Called it girl with the red hair back then

Those nights in the West docks

Appreciated

People can be changed

When I found out what my fate is

What my fate is

I don't really know

But I feel bad for thinking about the man upstairs around

As if there is some universal obligation to help me come down

I′ve come to terms with it, it makes me feel a little better

I'm sorry

Took me way too long to realize how lonely I felt

You can′t tell the time when you have no one to keep in check

I don't know how to handle this

This chaos that reigns in my temple

Raised by the people around me I would never stand a chance

I see your mind

Wish you could look me in the eyes

She almost called that fucking hotline

These never-ending "I′m fines"

Are you with someone else or is he just overthinking

This is my goodbye

I'm done with crawling

Done with shrinking

It's my end and I choose it

I hope you enjoy it

Is it even your fault?

Or did I fabricate it?

Like everything else I tend to manipulate

Others around me and now my own mind

Time, time, time again I′ve tried

To see the light

The good in all

Everything happens for a reason

Changes in my mental this season

Darker, everythings darker

Every little picture and person around you

Every little talk and picture about you

Every little text and message from you

Every fucking thing

I′m done with it

I'm disconnected

Refusing to understand it

I can′t accept it

I can't accept it

It′s too late

I've set the date

It′s my end and I choose it

Why does it feel so right

Ears bleeding, tears seeping

Moments fleeting

He did something unforgivable

Hard to say, hard to outline

What is so unforgivable?

Lips sealed shut

Black dark memories

I should stop blaming

There's nothing to destroy

He'll be fine

And I′ll move on

It′s not your fault

Not meant to be

It's useless

It′s useless

Does everyone?

Does everyone see him with the same eyes?

A different light

A different light

Do you see him with the same eyes?

Do you, do you, do you?

A different light

It's useless

Useless