Ninja Brian,

I invited a large number of girls over here for an orgy tonight

But I′ve to say the responses thus far haven't been what I′d hoped for

Stacy had a headache

Jenny was in jail

Brenda had to work late

Kate was getting Jenny's bail

Angela got scurvy

Ashley caught a cold

Sally's dad exploded

That′s what I was told

Michelle had to play checkers

Ann was baking pies

Wendy′s dad exploded too

That might've been a lie

Pam had frisbee lessons

Stella had ballet

Now I′m by myself

But I can have fun anyway, so...

Dim (dim) the lights (the lights)

Remove (remove) my tights

YEAH!

Nobody showed but I'm gonna have some fun

Let′s get this party started it's an orgy for one

It′s me and my hand and it's hotter than the sun

So break out the tissues it's an orgy for one

I′m workin′ out my issues in an orgy for one

Margaret's cat got nauseous

Jane was way too shy

Steve was not invited because he was a guy

Claire was parasailing

Brooke said she was in space

But it doesn′t matter

'Cause I′m rounding second base

All through (through) the night (the night)

My grasp (my grasp) is tight

OHHH

I'm beating so hard you′d think I was a drum

And I don't even care it's an orgy for one

I′m here all alone and I′m tuggin on my plums

It's not just masturbation it′s an orgy for one

It's a fuckin′ celebration it's an orgy for one

Orgy for one (orgy for one)

Orgy for one

Six (six) ty nine (ty nine)

Without (without) the nine (the nine)

Now pour (pour) the wine (the wine)

I′m mine (I'm mine) all mine

I'm batting a thousand and nailing everyone

Thank you everybody at this orgy for one

These pillows are stacked to look vaguely like a butt

You know I′m goin for it, it′s an orgy for one

My junk is getting sore and it's an orgy for one

You know that I′ll be scoring at the orgy for one

Orgy for one

Orgy for one