Lately these thoughts have been suicidal

Vital i use this median to escape for survival

Looking for ends i been so poor and feeling idleMeanwhile im shacking my shorty questioning what′s the title

Somethings i just leave on read

Laying down on my bed

Staring up at the ceiling

Wondering how to get feed

Overwhelmed by school trying not to drop out

Paranoid so the tool is present if they pop out

Anxiety racing

Pacing back and forth like a feen

Tired hospitals tired of funerals since a teen it's been reality

Lost my grandma granddad & cousin in the same week

In public fighting back tears so i won′t appear weak

Hard to keep peace

When your late on your lease

When your drowning in debt

And harassed by police

People care about dogs more than mass incarceration

Yet Cops are killing our dogs but

There is no conversation tell me why?

Wrestle with my conscious it's a slap fight

Loaded my subconscious keep me up Nights

Like liquor in my blood but it burns nice

Shaky on my feet like my first bike

Words flavors sweet like that first bite

Weren't there for me on my first night

Words failing me for the first time

Please don′t let me down you know i need you around me.

I′ve seen heaven seen hell

The two sides of Atl

One side creates the other side kills

One side gives the other side steals

Kick doors and hit licks

Get a fix or flip bricks

I stayed inside not to hide but my pride and joy was the music

As a getaway i would use to free my mind from reality everyday

Because honestly i felt pain in everyway

I'm a Product of a broken home

Mother alone

But I′m good with dad

She made sure by any means that i always had

Even when the water wasn't on

Or the cable she was able to keep food at the table

The sad reality she only could do so much

Man of the house before 10 she used me as a crutch

I saw things that i should never see

Heard screams paralyzed with fear i use to envy me for not doing a thing

I use to envy my step mom and dad

I use to envy my brothers and the lifestyle that they had

Visiting every other weekend felt like a vacay

Go out and then church the following day

That side felt like the Cosby′s then

Had to go back

To Ellenwood area where the hysteria was at

Made me a man

Partially made me bitter in stilled resentment i tucked away m

Dramatically changed me til this very day

Wrestle with my conscious it's a slap fight

Loaded my subconscious keep me up Nights

Like liquor in my blood but it burns nice

Shaky on my feet like my first bike

Words flavors sweet like that first bite

Weren′t there for me on my first night

Words failing me for the first time

Please don't let me down you know i need you around me.