Hey brother christian, with your high and mighty errand

Your actions speak so loud, I can't hear a word your saying

Hey sister bleeding heart, with all of your compassion

Your labors soothe the hurt, but can't assuade temptation

Hey man of science, with your perfect rules of measure

Can you improve this place with the data that you gather?

Hey mother mercy, can your loins bear fruit forever?

Is your fecundity a trammel or a treasure?

And I want to conquer the world

Give all the idiots a brand new religion

Put an end to poverty, uncleanliness, and toil

Promote equality in all of my decisions

With a quick wink of the eye and a "God you must be joking"

Hey mister diplomat, with your worldly aspirations

Did you see your children cry when you left them at the station?

Hey moral soldier, you've got righteous proclamations

And precious tomes to fuel your pulpy conflagrations

And I want to conquer the world

Give all the idiots a brand new religion

Put an end to poverty, uncleanliness, and toil

Promote equality in all of my decisions

I want to conquer the world

Expose the culprits and feed 'em to the children

I'll do away with their pollution and then I'll save the whales

We'll have peace on earth and global communion

I want to conquer the world

I want to conquer the world

I want to conquer the world

I want to conquer the world